After I made the executive decision that my boyfriend and I were going to live together, my father who has been married to my mother for twenty-five years passed on his secrets to a happier relationship.
Fret not; this isn’t going to be a lecture on the art of compromise, as I am not one to compromise…ever.
My father told me these two principles and I follow them day in and day out.
1. Never stop trying.
If you want to be the best in your field, you have to work hard. If you want to be top of your class, you have to work hard. If you want to spend the rest of your life a person, you have to work hard.
I love date night. At first I thought it was because it gave me an excuse to buy new shoes, and I got to walk around London with the hottest spice on my arm. Over the years I have realised that I love date night because it makes me fall in love all over again. Four years later and I still get excited when my partner texts me to say he has planned something for the evening, which could be anything from a trip to Barcelona, to watching Arsenal play football or building a den in our home and watching films until we fall to sleep.
Make your partner feel special, everyday. It should be right up there on your daily to do list, on par with brushing your teeth (which should be number one on everyone’s list). Making your partner feel special is as simple as a kiss when they least expect it, or a “you look amazing” before they head out.
I am a big believer in giving gifts. Sometimes the gifts I give to my other half take me so far into my overdraft, that I struggle to remember life before being in minus figures. Thankfully more often than not, the gifts are only a few pounds more than my daily coffee. The size of the gift is not important; I do it because I love to see my boyfriend smile. I will never stop trying to make my other half smile, even if it means that I am unable to buy shoes for a month (oh no, is this me compromising?).
2. Always remember why you first fell in love
Do things that remind you of your love. There is a song that always makes me think about my other half, and smile whenever I listen to it. Unfortunately I am unable to share this song with you as it is going to be my Wedding song, which makes it classified information. In case you are wondering, no I have not planned my wedding. I have just considered a few minor details such as: cake fillings, colour schemes, the bridal party and a guest list ranked in order of attendance priority.
Take a trip down memory lane and relive your first dates together. Laugh about how nervous you were or the time when your blouse got caught in your jeans and your partner, whom you barely knew at this point, had to help unzip you in the middle of a restaurant…Did this has happen to anyone else or was it just me?
Focus on the positives in your relationship and don’t sweat the small stuff.
Remember why you first fell in love and you will never stop falling in love.
(If any of you have mastered the art of obtaining a Boodles Ashoka ring, please share your knowledge with me as I quite haven’t got there….yet).